my toughest weekend

Happy Independence Day, America! This is the hardest time of harvest for me. Weddings, reunions, and birthdays are bummers but the Fourth stings like no other.

I feel silly as I type this and yet I would be lying to say I don’t feel bad for myself. Maybe this time of year was just too good growing up. My uncle had a cabin, we would go to a parade, and the weekend was just FUN. (Granted, I know it’s not always on the weekend but a multiple day celebration is weekend enough for me.)

Life changes and in my (fast) 28 years, nothing changes it like having a child. So, here I am remembering care free lake days, day drinking, celebrating America in pure ‘Merican style when in reality, I’d be sipping on a beer, chasing my kid and trying to make sure she doesn’t get run over at the parade, never leaving her when we were lake side, and simply put, things wouldn’t be the same as they once were. I try to bring my rationalizations forth and keep things in check and yet, I have a silent pity party on the Fourth where I avoid all social media like it’s the plague.

I will say I wake up on the 5th, think oh it’s Kelsey’s birthday (a friend since we were babies), think of all the people – especially those who attended a certain parade in Kranzburg – who feel absolutely awful, and it’s all good but the 4th, well it kind of sucks.

When Blake and I were dating, the gone all summer thing was a “what the heck?!” In reality, a really nice, hard working, funny, and loving husband trumps the 4th and all things summer and I promise, I know this. I think the rational side of me gets super annoyed with the emotional side because things are good. These celebrations are so very fun but for such a very short amount of time, in the scheme of it all.

Yesterday on the way to Denver, we pulled over for a few minutes and Bri was having the time of her life throwing rocks into a puddle. Blake and I were gathering her rocks for her and she was just so happy that mom AND dad were there. How many kids (or parents) get that on a random Wednesday? Not enough, judging be the lack of involvement parents have in their kids’ lives these days. So I guess in a life full of trade offs, I am going to say I’m doing alright. I really do hope everyone enjoys their day tomorrow and even if it’s not the best time ever in Tribune, KS for poor little Darcie, it’s completely okay.

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These two make it all worth it.

Happy 4th of July! Have a happy, fun, and safe day celebrating living in this great country! God bless the USA!

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